Tag Archives: off the reservation

And I bid you Adieu!

It has been a few months since I have posted, well, anything. There is a good reason for this and let me splain youse…

I moved to DC with a hierarchy of goals in mind and at the top of my list graduate school. So, pulled the trigger and moved. Made to the Deez C and hit the ground running. I have now been in the town for a few months and embarked on the psychotic journey that I call my life. I now work 40 hours a week at a job where I do not have internet or the ability to communicate with the outside world, needless to say, I will be finding a new job. I am also taking 3 graduate courses, to include weekend classes as well. Yes, my life is a bit off the chain right now. As I type this my roommates are moving out and I have to find a new joint closer to the city, as well as finding a new car due to the Wolverine incident.

Just JP

I started this blog as a way to keep writing, so not to lose any edge while waiting for classes to begin. Now that I am balls deep in school, I am going to cut this space loose. I enjoyed having an outlet and a place that I can rant, rave, and basically let me be me. I have met some awesome people through this blog and some crazy ass people too. It all comes with the territory I guess. All in all I would not trade it, nor would I do anything different.

JP

I feel this blog was only one side of myself, the nonsensical side, and I am glad that you dropped by to share in it. I would like to leave you with these parting words:

This will be my last confession,
Liberty can leave harsh impressions,
I have little faith forgive me for my past discretions,
But we live and learn that history and past are lessons,
Ive always played the hand I was given,
No exceptions here humanitys driven,
You see all men are born equal, just the standard of living,
That differs between the Jewish, Adriatic and Christian,
Im a logical man given to science,
Forgive me I know religion inspires,The day this is work the love of it dies, A handful make it, the others will strive,
And hunger can drive hatred but such is just life,
I guess jealousys the curse that the struggle inspires,
These critics seek to break and divide,
I know Im bitter but my faith is divine,
Take it in stride yeah I act like I hate it at times,
But I found love through this music and a place to reside,
For every friend I have an eager opponent,
For every cent I spent on meager components,
I gave something back so I dont feel the need for atonement,
Cause we all get our hands dirty when were seizing the moment.

Again, thanks for coming by for the past year or so! Be sure to keep up with me on Twitter, JustJPTweet, so you can keep up with my insanity. If you see me on the streets, just say hi to a guy named JP.
For all the ladies heartbroken and seeking a male perspective on things, check out my friends:

Don’t forget to check out everyone else too!

17 Comments

Filed under Booze, Foxy Friday, Friends, Life, Non-Sense

1 Year ago…

Check out how it all began: Click Here

18 Comments

Filed under Life

Briefly interrupt your service

demotivational-poster-Motivation - Office Space

 

 

Few reasons why I have not been on in a while:

  1. Since I quit my job, they have given me a replacement to train. This means I have the “new guy” sitting next to me all day as I show him the ropes. This will go on until I leave. This means no blog, Twitter, or sexy G-Chat messages ya’ll are used to. I feel disconnected.
  2. I am still recovering from all the parties that have been thrown in my honor.
  3. I have been very distracted with some new things in my life.
  4. Getting ready to move has been a bit stressful.
  5. By the end of the day, I have nothing more to say, to anyone.

 

I have been tempted to do V-Log if I can figure it out. So, stay tuned and I will try to bring you a few stories from the past few weeks.

 

Thanks for dropping in,

JP

15 Comments

Filed under Life

The Tracksuit Mafia!

What do you get when 4 assholes dressed alike in tracksuits? That’s right, you get the #tracksuit mafia. An idea months in the making… I would have posted this yesterday, but there were issues.[1] Where do I begin? Well, I guess a good old fashion time line is in order.[2]

15341_1113326443629_1540956664_30247880_7364353_n

The Tracksuit Mafia...

  • Made a trip to Chocolate bears house and picked up a bottle of Jack, Bushmills, Vodka, 2 Jagers, a Red Bull, and a pimp cup.
15341_1113326363627_1540956664_30247878_254193_n

Pimp Cup in Hand... Yes that went everywhere with us.

  • Back to the Honey Comb Hideout for an hour long pre-game.
15341_1113326403628_1540956664_30247879_1412113_n

Chocolate Bear "thugged out" with Winston

  • Crew shows up and nick-names were picked. I was Micky 4 knuckles.[3]
  • The power hour concludes and we roll to our normal spot where we met up with some friends. Our bar tab was dutifully named “the guido’s” tab.
15341_1113314043319_1540956664_30247831_10949_n

Gotta love your "friends"

  • We did not pay for that tab… someone we met there did, cause they thought we were awesome.[4] Also, there were some really weird guys trying to convince Chocolate Bear he needed to fight in the MMA. It was weird.
15341_1113326283625_1540956664_30247876_6379367_n

Guy that picked up our tab

  • We decided we needed to go to the local strip club, because, well, where else do 4 guys in tracksuits go? On the way there, we were cut off by some drunk asshole that called the big guy a “nigger”. Now, usually there would have been violence in this situation[5] but there was a cop right next to us with some other drunk asshole pulled over. This set the tone for the rest of the night.
  • Hit the strip club hard! They were also having a costume contest, which we were convinced we would win… Not really, especially when strippers entered. Damn. We did get on stage and saunter around though. At is at this point where we decided to use fake accents, not on the strippers, but everyone else around us. When asked about my costume, I used the line “sorry, my English, no, so good”. I had several people yelling the same thing they originally said and I did not laugh, instead I went with, “oh, kusstume? Oh da, kusstume! Me gangsta…Bang..Bang, while making a gun from my fingers. It was classic, because they bought into my bullshit.
  • Rolled out of the strip club and this is where is gets a bit, um, fuzzy.
15341_1113329123696_1540956664_30247883_530398_n

These were the shots, but I have no idea where we were...

  • I think we might have stopped off for Jager shots, but I really can’t be certain it was that night. We did end up in a more upscale neighborhood and at this one bar/club where a lot of cougar hunting is done. I decided Jimbo needed to bag himself a couger. Though, every time we go there the bouncer gives us a hard time about the way we are dressed. I am all, “come on bro, tracksuits! You are required by law to let us in.” He did and he shouldn’t have. We walked in and the place was dead. Slammed a single drink and bailed. On the way out I said something to the effect of I hate you or wtf. The doorman just laughed at us. Rightfully so.
  • As we are rolling down the street going to meet up with our friend, a truck in front of us was screwing around and it pissed off Chocolate Bear (CB), so he honked the horn.[6] The guy in front of us got out of the truck and so did CB. Me, J, and Jimbo were still in the back watching, as CB can handle himself…except, 3 other dudes got out and approached. So, the 3 of us in the back got out and we were confronted by an entire family reunion. Seriously, 3 cars were behind us and 2 cars in the 7-11 parking lot, equallying 30 about 30 dudes to the 4 of us. By this point I had conceded that I was going to get punched in the face.[7] It was as if the gangs of New York was remade and everyone was wearing Fubu.
2002_gangs_of_new_york_014

Imagine this scene, only in Fubu.

  • Somehow, we managed to get out unscathed. There was people yelling 5-0 and it might have helped. Regardless, it was something that I never thought would happen. I am so glad nothing went down, cause that’s the kind of shit that ends up on the news.
  • We finally made it to our friend’s bar. I walked in and ordered a beer, only to be denied, because we got there right at two.
  • Things went fuzzy again and food was involved at some point. It was pretty rough.
  • Woke up to see a buffet from Krystals had been consumed and noticed several bottles of Jager empty along with 100’s of beer bottles. Insane.
  • Watched the Florida Gators kick the shit out of Georgia!
  • Started it all over again. My costume started out as the guy who was too hung over to make a costume, then I switched to being a “transformer.” I start out as a regular guy, then by the end of the night, I am a drunk asshole.
15341_1113312443279_1540956664_30247824_707295_n

Jimbo as Ashe

15341_1113312643284_1540956664_30247828_2103573_n

Ahh, choices...To be good or to be bad.

15341_1113312483280_1540956664_30247825_2857710_n

When you try to smoke celery, you know you have had too much to drink.

15341_1113329203698_1540956664_30247885_7227533_n

Doing what he does best

15341_1113314123321_1540956664_30247833_1225202_n

And I am done...

That is the story of this last weekend. Thank you…


[1] The issue was I was still hung over on Monday and it was vicious.

 

[2] Sorry, I really wanted to try something different, but I am too challenged today.

[3] Think Franky 4 fingers, but more Irish.

[4] Umm, cause we are awesome!

[5] All of us would have gotten out of the car and kicked his ass.

[6] Now, in most situations, the next series of events would have gone way different.

[7] I am pretty, but I can take a punch or two when needed.

24 Comments

Filed under Friends

Musings of a Mad Man

Imagine if Hunter S. Thompson did win the election to be Sheriff, or Cobra Commander’s world domination plot succeeded and he overthrew G.I. Joe. What if Sleeping Beauty never got her kiss?

 

Why does the American ideal of “good” have to dominate our society so much? Why can’t Connor & Murphy McManus rid Boston of all the evil doer’s in their prescribed manner and not be shunned for their actions? Why is marijuana the scourge of American drug policy?

 

Think about it…

11 Comments

Filed under Non-Sense

¡Viva la Revolucion!

It wasn’t long ago when change was everywhere. Change that required hard work and great sacrfice on all that participated. Lives were lost and ideals were either proven or rejected. Regardless of the end result, these hearty men and women stopped talking and made shit happen. These days, we as a society are too weak to truly stage a revolution of the past, but instead we have our own personal struggles and strife. It is the assault on one’s personal identity and comfort zone that is this generations claim to independence. As much as I want this post to be a valiant profession of my internal struggle, it is really just a scared guy trying to sort it all out.

Revolution

On Friday, after I unloaded all the stress of my week onto print, I decided that my life needs to go in a new direction. The firm feeling that I am truly on my own, in all matters, boiled over and shook my core a bit. I have accepted that I am on my own and I will be in control of my success or failure. I had been holding off on all concrete plans about moving and starting school, all the while saying, “I am just not sure what I am doing yet.” That all changed on Friday afternoon. I rang the school that I was accepted to in the D.C. area and told them I will be attending class in January. BAM! Trigger pulled on grad school.

Toxic friendships, career futility, brazen alcohol abuse, and a reckless love life seemed like poor choices until I saw It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

On Sunday, I told both roommates that I would be out of the house and back into my apt in VA the weekend of Thanksgiving. I figure that I will hang out with the extended family before I go that way we all can spend time together before I am all broke. The problem with my moving plan is that I will be doing all of this a few days from my birthday (December 2) and of course a month before Christmas. Never said my timing was perfect, just doing what I can do.Today, I have handed in my formal resignation at work. I am giving them 5 weeks notice to get someone to fill my spot. Whether they fill it or not, its their issue. I am giving them ample time to get things off the ground. So, now that I have put this plan into motion (not really a plan, more like action) I have to do this. I do not have a job lined up where I am going and have never left a job without having another one lined up. I am freaking the hell out, but it is a calm and focused sort of energy.

Here is how this will go down:

  • Move the rest of my stuff to D.C. before my birthday.
  • Find  a job, any job, within the first week or two.
  • Start a full load (3 classes) the second week of January.

Here is what I am worried about:

  • Will have a trouble finding a job and will run into financial difficulty. Nothing like a 29 y/o male with no job to really attract the ladies.
  • Will be 29, broke, and really up a creek.
  • Will not be able to give christmas gifts to those I love. Christmas in my family is a huge event and it looks like I will be spending it alone. I don’t mind the lonely part, its the not being able to get anyone anything that really bothers me.
  • I could fail and fail hard.

Positives:

  • I am finally doing what I have been talking about for over a year. Maybe not the way I wanted to, but it is on.
  • I have the potential to succeed and do great.
  • There are people that support this decision and really don’t think it is too crazy.
  • I am advancing my education in a way I have always wanted and no one can take that from me.
  • I have done crazy shit before and come out on top.

So, I am going to see how it all plays out let it ride. I just keep telling myself one man’s genious is another man’s insanity.

39300905wax_20010808_06637.jpg

20 Comments

Filed under Life

Slightly Annoyed

***WARNING THIS IS VERY CYNICAL***

As I was driving to work today I got an email from the company I interviewed with last week. The one where I didn’t get any sleep and they changed the interview time; basically I was set up for failure because they didn’t have their shit together. They informed me that they will be going with another candidate. Essentially, I changed my vacation plans to be jerked around and wasted money and precious time. Hey1 thanks, I appreciate that, no really, thanks. Although, I did at least get the opportunity to go for it.

Moreover, there are other things in my life and people for that matter, that I really thought were different. I have known them for a while, yet I feel like I have been used. See being the nice guy some times2 will come back and blow up in your face. People often mistake kindness for weakness and will walk all over you. My roommate often tells me, “just put yourself out there and be nice to people. Let them know the real you.” The truth is I do put myself out there and I get burned a lot, but I continue to do it because each time I learn something new. People never surprise me and I am always cautiously paranoid, but have learned to keep quit and just ride out the storm.

With everything that has recently happened I feel I need to stop having faith in others.3 Time to go back to the old ways of JP. One, where I am the only one I can rely on and have blind faith in. A JP that takes big risks, but only for himself. I am tired, beaten down, but not broken. I have a goal in sight and I refuse to let things stand in my way. If people’s feelings get hurt along the way, consider this my formal apology, as there will be none given past this point.

Lesson learned on all fronts in my life.

Father,
you know where I have been and
you know what I have done
they say that you see everything
so you know I never hurt no one
What I have stolen won’t be missed
By those who had so much, so long
We’ll soon be laughing about this
They will never notice it is gone
I could bend the universe
It I can only get there first
There are some foolish fresh laid plans
My fate is firmly in your hands4

1Insert company name

2I really try to deny my asshole nature and go out of my way

3And being such a trusting sucker

4Devotchka “Undone”

11 Comments

Filed under Life