Tag Archives: Still hustlin’

Slightly Annoyed

***WARNING THIS IS VERY CYNICAL***

As I was driving to work today I got an email from the company I interviewed with last week. The one where I didn’t get any sleep and they changed the interview time; basically I was set up for failure because they didn’t have their shit together. They informed me that they will be going with another candidate. Essentially, I changed my vacation plans to be jerked around and wasted money and precious time. Hey1 thanks, I appreciate that, no really, thanks. Although, I did at least get the opportunity to go for it.

Moreover, there are other things in my life and people for that matter, that I really thought were different. I have known them for a while, yet I feel like I have been used. See being the nice guy some times2 will come back and blow up in your face. People often mistake kindness for weakness and will walk all over you. My roommate often tells me, “just put yourself out there and be nice to people. Let them know the real you.” The truth is I do put myself out there and I get burned a lot, but I continue to do it because each time I learn something new. People never surprise me and I am always cautiously paranoid, but have learned to keep quit and just ride out the storm.

With everything that has recently happened I feel I need to stop having faith in others.3 Time to go back to the old ways of JP. One, where I am the only one I can rely on and have blind faith in. A JP that takes big risks, but only for himself. I am tired, beaten down, but not broken. I have a goal in sight and I refuse to let things stand in my way. If people’s feelings get hurt along the way, consider this my formal apology, as there will be none given past this point.

Lesson learned on all fronts in my life.

Father,
you know where I have been and
you know what I have done
they say that you see everything
so you know I never hurt no one
What I have stolen won’t be missed
By those who had so much, so long
We’ll soon be laughing about this
They will never notice it is gone
I could bend the universe
It I can only get there first
There are some foolish fresh laid plans
My fate is firmly in your hands4

1Insert company name

2I really try to deny my asshole nature and go out of my way

3And being such a trusting sucker

4Devotchka “Undone”

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