Lately I have noticed that we as men, are no longer men. I mean this in the most traditional reflection of what a man should be. Example:
If you wear these, you are not a man!
Seriously, how do your balls get oxygen? Oh, yea skinny jeans= no balls.
If you look like these knuckle heads, you are not a man:
I am sure by this point you are thinking, “what the hell is JP going on about now?” Simply put, these douche bags above were “competing” on a show called Daisy of Love. They were trying to “earn” the love this seriously crazy and hot broad’s “love”:
So how did I come across this abortion? Umm, did you see the pic above, she’s hot and totally insane! Me=Total sucker. So, I started watching this show and my immediate thought was that men these days, do not know how to be men.
Think about this, in the 1930’s and 1940’s men had 2 roles provide and protect their (insert wife, home, booze) what ever. Their duty was to, well, be men. They are called the greatest generation because they went to war, defeated everyone, then took over the world. I vaguely remember someone else trying that too…
Again, the skinny jeans, goofy ass hair cuts and really, really flamboyant clothing is just not working for the men of America. I mean, how can any country take us seriously with the clowns dressed up like the picture above? I remember my Grandfather telling me about gin joints, chasin’ skirts, and of course working hard and making a living. Look at man now. We no longer work outside, our farming industry is in the dumps, and obesity is our worse enemy.
When did we as American men become such pussies? Now, I am speaking in an overture; fire fighters, military, and hard working guys all around are our only saving grace.* Now, we sit on our asses and stare at computer screens all day. How did this happen? For god sakes, men used to carry flasks of gin and wear hats with their suits. They knew how to fix their (insert anything you touch) with the most basic of tools. Men never needed to “work out” in a gym, the day’s labor took care of all of that.
Recently speaking with a good friend, I realized that we, as men, are not meant to be kept indoors. The glass prisons of the corporate world are oppressing us. Seriously, when was the last time you guys out there went hunting for your own food? In fact when was the last time you grew your own food, or even cooked it? Let’s face it we are weak. What happens if the “big” day (nuclear Holocaust, 4 horsemen) of ruin comes upon us, would you be ready? Could you survive?
Face it, we are weak and have no class or style. When was the last time you opened the car door or any door for a woman? Stood up for someone that could not stand on their own? Or just do something that moves you.
Guy’s I am not breaking balls here, all I am trying to do is point out that yes we “evolved” but into what. The moniker of Gentleman was once used to represent one who embodied man. Seriously, I cannot remember the last time I heard that word used. So, this is my appeal for men everywhere to reclaim their manhood and “devolve” a bit. Go back to treating women like ladies, drinking from a flask, and get into an unapologetic fist fight with your buddies, just because he pissed you off.
Get out and be a man! Blast some Skynard, drink from a can, and grill an animal you killed yourself. Then for the coup de grace find the hottest broad in the joint and take ‘er home.
P.S. Ladies, this was purely targeted at the guys today. I have one for you in a few days.
*Please note Cops are not on this list.