Don’t mess with my routine

So it has almost been a week since I have been on mainly due to a crazy work schedule, but also my own devices. I had to unplug my brain for a hot minute. Then, yesterday happened! Let me marinate your brains with some flavor…

Many of us have a routine in the morning, some are more rigorous and complex than others. Personally, mine is more of a comfort issue and not so much a necessity; however, change one thing in my line up and my brain falls apart. Take these fine observances for example:

  • What the hell is this? Antiques? Where is my BBC World New’s? I want my worldly updates with a British wit and sarcasm, not fucking antiques. Oh well, time for Sports Center!
  • Holy hell, how did it get so damn cold so fast. Yesterday I was sweating my balls off and today my boys are going to get frost bite, what the hell?
  • If this chick taps her brakes one more time I swear I will ram my Lincoln straight up her ass!
  • Why must women people speak to me in the morning? Nothing of significance has happened since last night that I need a pre-coffee update. Now, piss off.
  • Yes, I am in a bad mood (see reasons above) and I hate Dr. Phil. So what are your chances that I will be nice to you while you ask me “whats wrong”? You, you are whats wrong.
  • I feel my inner ninja poised for attack.
  • That’s it! I am taking my toys and going home…

I realized that this blog is a nice outlet and comes in handy to release my bottled up energy. Bear with me for a bit I am trying to accomplish a few things that require some kind of attention span. With that said, here is the line up for the rest of the week:

TMI Thursday: Where we explore the world of farts; mainly because my ER stories are grossing people out.

Friday Holy Hale of an Ale: I will be reviewing 3, that’s right 3, seasonal Ales; Dogfish Head’s Black and Blue and Fort along with Lagunitas’ Hop Stoopid Farm House Ale.

I will also be making an appearance over at the PQNation as well.



Filed under Life

10 responses to “Don’t mess with my routine

  1. I was in such a precoffee haze this morning that I blew right past LiLu on the street.

    Poor neglicted LiLu! For shame Lemmy, for shame.

  2. I often feel my inner ninja poised to attack. Stupidity’s hard enough to deal with on a daily basis, but first thing in the morning? Oy.

    Yea, his sword is always ready for action. Stealthy bastard.

  3. k8

    You’ve read about my morning routine, right? DO NOT TALK TO ME. MUST I REPEAT? DO NOT TALK TO ME. FOR ANY REASON. There is NO NEED.

    And I love your ER stories. Loveit.

    I knew you would understand!

  4. “ram my lincoln up her ass” …

    … that’s what he said?

    While wearing a stove pipe hat!

  5. I think my TMI might even impress you of high standards this week…

    Bring the noise girl!

  6. My morning routine is way lamer. It involves cleaning cat litter boxes and then walking to work like some kind of shlubb.

    I wish I could walk to work. I would feel much better about my day.

  7. Watching Letterman from the night before, the local AM news and then in the car. Of course in the car, I start to wonder if this type of work is what I really wanted to do, when was the last time I got laid, and fantasizing about getting laid by various women both celebs and not.

    I’m probably a typical male.

    Yes, I think all guys go through this process.

  8. Damn you and your overachieving self! All I do is drag myself from the soft surface to the hard surface and blink.

    All morning talk should be banned unless it is dirty.

    I will talk dirty to you any time of day, because I care.

  9. Routine brings structure and peace to my life- I know what it’s like when it gets disrupted. I also do not like getting talked to in the morning. I just need an hour or two of silence.

    I have the only after coffee rule. Meaning until I get my coffee, piss off.

  10. i feel your pain

    I was deeply scarred.

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