Lately anything that is more advanced than a toaster or calculator has been failing me. But not your normal “dead device” failure, I mean the kind of failure that taunts and harasses you. My phone (crackberry) had a most unfortunate run in with water on Halloween and proceeded to have a massive stroke and completely blink out. However, like the electronic Jesus 3 days later, it came back to life. Kind of mellow and unassuming for awhile after that. Then Christmas came around and all the family and friends are in town, what happens, thats right seizure time. After a little bit of therapeutic “tweaking” it came back. Then died for good. Or so I thought.
I had become very used to the feeling that I had no phone and told people to go old school; leave a message and I will get back to you. No, I cannot text you back and if you get pissed it’s your own fault. I remember how we used to do it, before cell phones and even pagers. You either called the house, or a friend to see if the person is with them, or even swung by the house because you knew they were home. The Australians call it “calling” that means to “call someone” you go by and see them. Ringing involves a phone. But I am afraid this concept is lost on the average American, more prevalently, the crackberry user.
For the first week, yes I said week as this has been an on going affair, people were a little lets say, “pissy” about me not “getting back to them.” Well, when you just give up, others tend to follow suit. I call this the 8th step of my total slacker 12 step program, which will be discussed later this week for those with no real aspirations. A funny thing started to happen people began ringing other people and calling over to my house. Truth be told I felt like a real person, with face to face interaction and a real level of communication. And no one complained! It was glorious. I would get real emails from people (today’s version of a mailed letter) that had depth and virility. I was at peace with my loss as I gained complexity. People really had to do something to be social, like we used to do.
Then, last week all my phones were dead and my computer cord took a massive dump. Left me in the dark! This was unnerving, I am now really out of step with the world. Ahhh, peace and serenity and a calming wave of knowledge passes gently over me. As annoying as it is, to not have these items, it reinforces what I have said for years; I could totally move to a remote place, grow and hunt my own food, make my beer, and pseudo- live off the land. You know go totally back to 1980 when you had a rotary house phone and people came to socialize.
This has been both frustrating and eye opening. Yea I am kind of dead in the water, but also it’s feels more natural not to have something attached to me all the time. It has been a nice disconnect and become a libertine. So would I like to reconnect? Sure! All my numbers are still locked inside a dead phone–my mom used to write all of her numbers on the back of the kitchen calender and yes we had a calender in the house, archaic right?–Once I retrieve them I can slowly climb out of my hole. For now, I am going to stay off the grid as much as possible. Truly that myface website helps one to stay some what in touch, but really? I encourage all of you to join my unintentional protest and get back to your roots, hit up a pay phone and ring a friend, tell them you are calling over.